Four Years of Fighting

Thrilled to be on this journey of a lifetime with the Ninja.
Photo courtesy: LaBrisa Photography

Two [trailer] houses. A totaled car. Burst pipes. Two weddings. Four Ohio State fairs. Two Masters of Science degrees. A shattered crockpot filled with gravy. Zero babies. Most of a PhD in Animal Science.

Believe it or not, we have shoved all of those amazing experiences into 1,460 wedded-days full of celebrating, accepting, loving, fighting, laughing, compromising, competing, stressing, [blatant] honesty and joy. Today, I reflect on one of the most important items in that list: fighting.

Robert Louis Stevenson once said, "Marriage is one long conversation chequered by disputes."

Accurate, Mr. Stevenson.

It's truth time, peeps. Here are the many ways we fight in marriage.

- With each other

This is the obvious one. For those of you who aren't married, take it from me. The arguments don't stop once you say 'I do.' Little things like taking out the garbage can, under the wrong circumstances, yield just as big of an argument as the decision as when to buy a house. God made us all differently, which means that we all have varying opinions and when thrown into a small space with another human, we inevitably will have disagreements. But how you handle these disagreements will be the true test of your relationship. Can you learn to compromise and move on together? Or will you fail to learn from past experiences and let resentment fester? The choice is, as cliché as it sounds, up to you.

Let's not forget, that arguments are a form of communication. And if you aren't communicating, it's going to be hard to plan your life, make decisions, move forward and grow. So it's ok to get in a heated discussion about when the next chapter of your life will start or how many candles you need in your house or what brand of salsa to buy. But let's just try to keep it civil, people. Above the belt and no snarky comments that can seriously cause damage to your relationship. That whole "sticks and stones may break my bones" shtick is a crock of Crisco. Words can, and do, hurt - so be nice and play fair.

- With ourselves.

You might wonder how I fight with myself in my marriage. And, building upon that, how does winning a fight against myself help my marriage?

I'm a competitive person and I like to have the last word. I especially love to have the last word when I'm right and someone else is wrong. All of these compounded together can make me an especially unpleasant person in the heat of an argument. It's a constant struggle for me to beat back my snarky side when I desire to make a point, and instead let the sweeter voice of reason win, hence allowing peace to come to our humble little trailer.

By fighting with my inner demon, and winning, I am making a conscious effort to be the best version of myself that I can be for the sake of my marriage and my personal wellbeing.

- For each other.

This is the most important fight you will have in your marriage. No I am not talking about throwing punches in honor of your betrothed - although I would not hesitate to do so if provoked. I am talking about a spiritual and emotional fight for each other.

There is a huge enemy to your marriage and his name is Satan. The enemy will fight to plant doubts and fears in your marriage. The enemy will make you think that one disagreement is a sign to end your commitment. The enemy will tempt you and your spouse with other men and women, with ideas of "bigger and better." Ignore that bastard, link arms with your spouse, get down on your knees and work together towards a strong marriage that is rooted in faith and prayer. If you don't fight for each other and put each other first, no one is going to do it for you. It's up to you and your partner to find strength in your faith and make the commitment to work through the crappy days and relish the exciting ones.

As I've mentioned before, marriage is far from easy. It's the most challenging, yet most rewarding, endeavor I've ever undertaken and is equally as frightening as it is enthralling. A loving, gratifying marriage is worth fighting for but both people have to be engaged in the fight. I am a firm believer that a few bad fights are the fee you pay for the most exhilarating experience of your life. Suck it up folks, make some sacrifices in order for a lifetime of happiness with the one you love.

Alright, here's where you come in - do you think I'm completely off-base? What are your thoughts on marriage and making it last?

Until next time
~ Buzzard ~

p.s. I want to stress the "zero babies" part of this blog post. The eggo is not preggo. That is all.

The Ninja did not contribute to this blog post but he did review and edit so anything embarrassing has been approved.

Dos Anos

That's two years for the non- Spanish speaking.

Dos anos ago, this happened:

Ah, sweet wedded bliss.

So today this week, things are going to be a little more mushy on the blog. I can't help it. I love the Ninja. A lot.

Last year, I shared the details of how we spent our first wedding anniversary and I'll be doing the same this year. I always (does two years count as always?) put the Ninja in charge of these things because he blows them out of the water. Seriously, so thoughtful. But until then, here are some of my favorite photos from the big day and the festivities afterwards. And these aren't your normal cliche, picturesque photos (well a smidgen of them might be) but are the outtakes and hilarious candids from a day of love and laughter; family and friends. I even narrate - enjoy!

 We did this exact same thing at her wedding a few weeks ago - can't

 keep a straight face around that gal!

 The Ninja missed the 'be serious' memo

 What's not to love about this picture? They were in unison for a good 10 seconds. epic.

 Two reasons I like this photo: 1) I love having a picture of the Ninja and I praying together 2) My dad and the groomsmen decided to pull a little prank. Check out his shoes!

We stood in the door for a few minutes because we were supposed to wait for the music to change and it was awkward.

 Photo fail by the Ninja. I must have said something hilarious, as usual.

 Again, miscommunication between the photogs. I thought we were supposed to look gangsta, while Becca obviously went the more photogenic route. We did this at her wedding too.

 Andy, the best man, talked about how he warned the Ninja that I 'was a handful.' A handful of awesome! (notice the empty Crown Royal bottle so early in the night)

 I love all of these guys (well, most of them - right, Rooney?)

 Papaw and I

I love what a great big-brother my husband is - he's going to be a fantastic father!

 Not our first dance but I love that the Ninja has some great dance moves now. He didn't have any when we met - mega points to me for having rhythm and being able to teach him how to two-step and swing dance.

 The power of prayer with my best ladies

 Cheap shot, Ninja. Thank goodness for cousins to wipe cake off my face. Thanks, Court.

No wedding in Manhattan is complete without swing dancing at Longhorn's. in your wedding dress. to this song.

 See? I told you I taught him how to dance.

All photos by Grant Watkins (except the bar photos)

What are some of your favorite photos from weddings you've attended or your own wedding?

Until next time,

~ Buzzard~

My Baby: Semi-Wordless Wednesday

Nope, I'm not pregnant.

Moving on - my children are much more expensive to feed and are considerably larger. My favorite child, my pride and joy, my baby - the superstar athlete, straight A student, cuddly cute one is Doc. You've seen him here.

 And there is the problem child - the one who sneaks out of the house to meet up with the punk rock boyfriend, the child who gets kicked out of prom and the one who doesn't care what I say because I'll never understand how hard her life is (*sigh*). Meet Friday, less affectionately known as HB. I'll let you figure that out for yourself. I bought her from my brother - she is a super nice heel horse and I am adding breakaway roping to her repertoire and she's not doing bad at all.

In all fairness, she isn't really mean or anything. She just isn't finished and I don't devote as much to her as I should. She's also not Doc, which unfortunately makes her #2 in my book even though she can't help it. Favorite child syndrome going on at the FroBuzz Ranch. That said, I have ridden three times this week and things are going well. I anticipate that by next spring, she'll be ready for a summer full of rodeos; once I get her to run through a barrier and some other minor stuff like that.

Sorry for all the words.

Until next time,
~ Buzzard ~

The Sunflower/Wheat State

My sisters in-law (I have three) are constantly at odds with me about what Kansas is known as - I call it God's Country and the Wheat State, among other things, and they refer to it as Sunflower State. I  found proof of the Wheat State and other names, too. So we all win but since I recently met some amazing people from North Dakota who grow sunflowers and I was also in South Dakota last weekend and got to see some more beautiful sunflowers whilst cattle shopping, today is a post about sunflowers.

I got to meet Jenny Lynn Dewey (we have the same middle name - cool!) and the love of her life, Mark Rohrich, at a tweetup in Kansas City last week. More on that later but the point is that they grow sunflowers and Jenny takes gorgeous photos so she gave me permission to share her sunflower musings and photos here - enjoy! They also have the sweetest love story that will make you want to melt like Hershey's in July. Seriously, presh. And visit her blog, her Facebook page, like Mark's business, Maverick Ag, on Facebook and you can follow them both on twitter @sunflowerfarmer and @jenlynndewey. They're great people - super friendly, funny and outgoing! 

Celebrating North Dakota Agriculture: Sunflowers

By: Jenny Lynn Dewey

Well since it is Thank a Farmer Friday AND the sunflowers around here in North Dakota are BLOOMING, I figured today would be appropriate to share with you all the beauty that I’ve been witnessing for the past week. Until stepping foot into North Dakota, I would have never imaged North Dakota to be a national leader when it comes to production of many different crops.  It’s safe to say I have never before witnessed fields of crops that are seemingly endless. But let me tell you, there is something magical about coming across a field of blooming yellow sunflowers as far as the eye can see. It literally makes you stop in your tracks and takes your breath away. It makes me stop and realize how blessed I am to be calling this beautiful place home now. And even more so, that I am able to wander in the sunflowers with my farmer while he checks them. I finally begged Mark to go out crop touring. He’s been so busy with Maverick Ag that we haven’t spent much time out on the farm lately. But we finally took an evening and drove out to check it out.
You may recall that I took photos of their aerial applicator, LaDelle’s Spraying Service, in action over this same field of sunflowers. At that point they were just starting to bloom. Stay tuned for a post on that!

And… a few days later, holy moly! They were in FULL bloom. I was so amazed how a few days can make that much of  a difference. I am constantly learning around here!
It’s hard to tell by the photo but most of these sunflowers are well over my head. They were planted in the first part of June and if you’ve been following, when I visited in July right around the 4th of July, they looked like this…
So as you can tell, these babies did some serious growing! And with not a whole lot of rain! Farming fascinates me. I could have stayed here all evening photographing every angle of these beauties!

Things I learned from walking in a field of sunflowers.. You will get pollen EVERYWHERE, as you can tell by some of the photos. AND the heads are in fact quite sticky in the middle. So don’t touch unless you want sticky fingers.
My farmer also taught me how to tell when the flowers have been pollinated. Below all that fuzz in middle of the head, there are seeds underneath. You know, the kind we all love to eat at baseball games! But in order for those seeds to mature, they need to be pollinated. These sunflowers have just begun pollination and you can tell by that outer ring in the middle of the head. Once they have finished pollinating, the center will be completely filled in. However, sometimes the flowers won’t even reach full pollination. Environmental factors can inhibit them from fully pollinating such as stress from weather.
The seeds underneath begin white and turn black once they have been pollinated. See in the photo above how they are black? Those parts of the sunflowers have been successfully pollinated. Bees are responsible for the pollination of these fields. Farmers contract bee hives to be set near fields and the bees go to work. Because of the symbiosis between the bees and the sunflowers here, North Dakota ranks number one in the nation’s productions for both sunflowers AND honey! With the state producing 24% of the nation’s honey and 43% of the nation’s sunflowers! North Dakota is also a leader in the production of spring wheat, durum, barley, flaxseed, and canola! Who would have thought North Dakota was such a leader in agriculture!?
Once the seeds from these beautiful fields are harvested (stay tuned for that, you betcha I will be posting on that!), they will be used for primarily three different markets: oil production (oils), de-hulls, and confection varieties. Sunflower oil is the primary use and has a variety of difference usages including fuel! De-hulls (or de-shelled) are basically like what you would buy in the store to put on your salads or simply enjoy them without having to fight with a shell, and confections are roasted in the shell and a lot of times flavored for you to enjoy at your favorite baseball game or whenever!
So the next time you enjoy sunflower seeds, wherever you are, thank a farmer! And specifically, thank a North Dakota farmer for being the number one producer in the nation of sunflowers. Thank them for putting in days that are much longer than your average 9-5 in order to get these seeds planted as well as harvested. Thank them for relying on the grace of Mother Nature to give them enough water for these plants to grow as well as for these farmers to make a living. Thank them for all the hard work, stress, sweat, and tears that have been shed over these crops so you can go to the store and buy a bag of sunflower seeds to enjoy! And today, I am thanking this farmer…
For teaching me about farming so that I can share with all of you, for constantly putting up with my many questions, for all the hard work he does, and most importantly to me, for taking a chance on love and sweeping me off my feet and all the way to North Dakota. I would have never imagined that I would end up with a farmer or that I would become so immersed into the world of farming, but here I am. And you know what, I am loving every minute of it. I am learning, I am loving, and today, I am celebrating agriculture in my new home state of North Dakota! Welcome to my new life of the prairie!